Party-Goers Find Back Door into Uranus

party  URANUS, MO – Despite the many efforts by authorities to keep Uranus quiet, loud parties are popping up in Uranus almost every night.

  The question is, how are these party Goers getting in?

  Lead investigative Reporter for the Daily Uranus, Kim Huffman,  turned to local business owners for answers. According to some sources, Uranus has a “back door”. This small piece of information leads officials to the next question, how do these party animals find the back door to Uranus?

  The answer, it seems, is a well-known “secret” among the citizens of Uranus.

  After several hours combing the area of Uranus, investigators learned that for the most part “party poopers” in Uranus were unwelcome.

  Authorities also learned from an anonymous tip,details about an underground railroad called the Head Out Lower Exit, more commonly referred to as the HOLE.

 Upon visiting this so called HOLE, investigators discovered a poorly maintained road with more potholes than in all of Uranus combined.

  Deputy Mayor Brian Muench informed the authorities that before Uranus was popular, this wasn’t even a road, it was what locals called “Mud Slick Alley”. It was a popular location for tractor pulls, where those people who are blessed with “monster machines” could tear things up in Uranus.

   Now many years later it seems the locals have been using this as a way to sneak in large groups who just want to have a good time in Uranus.

  Further investigations found that the recent heavy traffic Uranus has been getting through the HOLE has caused severe erosion to the terrain. The presence of huge mud holes indicate that a heavy rain could completely wash out Uranus.

  Long time Mayor of Uranus, Louie Keen, has scheduled a meeting to determine whether extending a welcome invitation to these party goers into Uranus would stop the abusive use of the old “pulling grounds” or  if continued unwelcome incursions into Uranus would place the city in an awkward position.

Party in Uranus

   “Just let them come and fill Uranus with all the business they want. So what if they want to party and have a good time? To me the most important thing is having fun in Uranus,” said resident Kraig Koger.

 

A new documentary called “Into the Glory Hole,  How Steven Leonard penetrated Uranus” – by award winning local director Allen Dale Shortell is expected to release soon.  Allen’s film covers the dirty parts of Uranus that aren’t normally seen by the public.  Allen was overheard saying “ I have spent a lot of time in Uranus, sometimes I get deep undercover and try to probe the darker side of what, on the outside, appears to just be a normal place.

If you have any stories about Uranus that you would like covered, please comment below

One Response

  1. Wendy February 6, 2014